THE EGO, the External “I”

When I was very young, my parents separated, and I could no longer live with my father, so I only saw him occasionally. But since the day I was born, I have always remembered my father looking the same as he does now; he has always kept his head completely shaved. I often wondered why he never let his hair grow out a bit because I knew he could have a different look. His hair was naturally thick and abundant, so why not try another style?

One day, I asked him, “Why don’t you let your hair grow a little longer so you can have a different appearance?” His response was, “Because I don’t identify with that.” When I heard this, he noticed the look of surprise and confusion on my face. I didn’t fully understand what he meant. His answer was so profound yet so simple that it took me time to grasp its true meaning. What he was trying to tell me was that he did not identify with the Ego.

The Ego is that “I” that we all have, and in one way or another, it sabotages our true self. We are surrounded by so much external information that it confuses our real essence. Everything we are on the outside, the way we style our hair, dress, and adorn our bodies, is the Ego in its fullest expression. But the truth is, what we show to the world is not who we really are. It is a false construction of ourselves, created by our minds in an attempt to feel important, to be better than others, to be more beautiful or attractive. The Ego always wants to win, to stand out above the rest. However, these shallow pursuits take us further away from our spirit, the part of us that is different from what we project, turning us into selfish, egocentric, and superficial beings.

Social media confuses people even more, making them believe that they are the image they present to the world. But in reality, that image is just a grain of sand in the vast ocean of who we truly are. Every time you feed your Ego, your essence scatters. That is when sadness and desperation arise, the desperate need to stand out. But in truth, every human being has much more to offer and discover than mere physical appearance.

After understanding this, the question that inevitably follows is: How do I eliminate my Ego? The truth is, you can’t eliminate it. You must learn to live with it. To transcend it requires courage and bravery with yourself. The first step is to accept yourself exactly as you are. Let go of the need for external validation, the desire to win, or even the urge to put yourself on display for attention. At first, it will hurt. It will hurt so much that you won’t even understand why. But when you finally learn to understand and love yourself just as the universe created you, without wanting to change the shape of your nose or the size of your breasts, you will embark on a long journey to the center of your being. That is where you will find fulfillment, free from that manipulative mental voice that worries about what others think, who approves of you, or how attractive you are compared to others.

To discover the true essence of being, begin by accepting yourself. Accept yourself, without competition or falsehoods. Begin the internal work, which is a challenging yet necessary path that every human being should undertake. Remember, we must value our whole selves to uncover the true treasure that lies within.